If Virginia Is For Lovers, What Is New Jersey For?

All jokes aside, there is something truly unique about New Jersey. Parts of it are really industrial (and they smell like it too). Other parts are so pleasantly nondescript that a general photo could trick viewers into thinking that it was taken somewhere else. Perhaps most importantly, there are parts that are so historic and breathtaking that even the passage of time can't diminish their natural beauty. Guess which parts we visited?

We did have to cut through a little bit of options one and two here and there, but finally reaching option three was more than worth it. After arriving in Philadelphia late Friday night, our first stop on Saturday was Cape May, the southern-most point in New Jersey and a seaside town full of old Victorian houses and turn-of-the-century whimsy. My grandparents (on my mom's side) lived here when I was younger, and it was almost surreal how identical everything looked to my youthful memories.

That uncanny sense of direction helped me guide us toward memorable areas. Because I was able to find the library, I knew that my grandparents' old apartment building had to be nearby, and their building led me to the small commercial district that started across the street. If my internal compass had kicked in sooner, maybe we wouldn't have worn out Chris's phone by using the navigation app so often!

I was rather disappointed to see that some of the local businesses had given way to corporate influences like Dairy Queen and Ben & Jerry's. Other than that, most of what I was able to remember was there: the arcades, the mini-golf courses, the ancient boardwalk motels. My preferred stop for salt water taffy, Fralinger's, is still standing. (And still delicious!)

I was more relieved to discover that my favorite childhood store is still around too. Whale's Tale is a beach-themed gift and novelty shop with a great selection of children's books and educational toys and games. Yep, I was that big of a nerd, and I still am! I insisted on going in to see how it had changed over the years. Aside from the obvious ins and outs of inventory, I took great comfort in the fact that the store looked, felt, and even smelled the same.

The mix of salty ocean air and fragrant home decor sent me and my nose flying down memory lane. I couldn't quite figure out exactly how long it had been since I last visited this part of the Jersey shore, but it must have been at least 20 years ago. (If any family members can help me establish a more definitive timeline, I'd greatly appreciate it!) Either way, it was wonderful to relive the past while also sharing the present with Chris. 

We had just started to head back to the rental car when a huge rainstorm hit. There was no thunder or lightning, but enough strong wind and heavy rain to send everyone scrambling for cover... or an umbrella (ella, ella) large enough to handle the elements. Our small but mighty umbrella was no match for the wind, so we stayed dry with a few other brave tourists under the awning of a shoe store for about 30 minutes. 

Once the storm weakened to a light drizzle, we resumed our trek to the car -- but not before a quick stop for water ice. (Shout-out and shameless plug for Rita's!) Those of you who have tasted this magical nectar for yourselves need no further background, but for those of you who do, Wikipedia explains it best. Water ice is more hydrating and refreshing than a snow cone or a Slurpee, so Colorado could certainly use a few shops of its own. A stand in LoDo or on Pearl Street would be a hit, especially considering how hot our recent summers have been.

Less than two hours later, we arrived in Atlantic City, which is farther north along the coast. While it hasn't retained the majestic glory of its storied past, plenty of reminders still exist of just how influential the city used to be as a destination. (Think of it as a smaller, oceanfront Las Vegas Strip.) Between disasters both natural and financial, AC has managed to thrive at a lesser scale, but it's still a fascinating seasonal locale.

After checking in at the legendary Claridge Hotel, we were disheartened to see that the rain had returned in fuller force than earlier that afternoon. We clearly picked the wrong day to visit the shore, but torrential rain doesn't get in the way of hungry travelers! We ran under the cover of three different buildings to reach Caesars Palace and still managed to get drenched. Undeterred, we made our way up to their Palace Court Buffet to celebrate Chris's birthday by eating our way through an impressive spread of various cuisines. While we were surprised that wine wasn't included with our dinner (since it had been at the Monte Carlo's buffet on our last trip to Vegas), we definitely got our money's worth trying a little bit of everything else.

On Sunday, we hit the boardwalk to take in the sights and sounds of the beach. (Side note: Atlantic City was the inspiration for the classic board game Monopoly, and The Claridge sits at the corner of Boardwalk and Park Place. By staying there, do I automatically win every time I play Monopoly from now on?) It was already quite warm for only 10 in the morning, but the ocean breeze kept us from melting. We felt even worse for the stragglers of some kind of race or marathon that had taken place earlier in the day. Dealing with the heat on top of running through a growing crowd takes a dedicated athlete.

Elsewhere on the boardwalk, we managed to avoid any run-ins with rejected applicants for "Jersey Shore," and Chris mastered how to tell the difference between bro-dudes and dude-bros. It's an important distinction, and I'm considering offering a seminar -- you know, from a social anthropology perspective! Some of my working titles are "Know Your Bros," "Bromance For Beginners," and "Douchebags 101."

By Sunday afternoon, we're already done with the Jersey leg of our adventure, but the trip is far from over. The bulk of our journey awaits us in and around downtown Philadelphia. Pennsylvania and New Jersey are mere miles apart -- down to just feet in some places -- but it feels like a whole other world away when considering the one-of-a-kind charms of the Garden State. (See? I can be nice to Jersey when I want to be!)

P.S. I do have one closing sentiment about someone who has been an East Coast fixture for a long time. He's always been controversial, but now he's past the point of no return and I was able to tell him so. Actually, I told one of his buildings. With a certain finger. I decided that this was probably a more polite thing to publish:

Chris & Rob's East-ellent Adventure

Bill and Ted's adventures took them through time in a phone booth and later to Hell and back. Our adventures over the next week or so will take us through time zones and state lines in a variety of transportation modes... and still to Hell and back in the form of New Jersey (wink).

That's right, boys and girls! It's time for an epic summer vacation the likes of which have rarely been seen outside of a National Lampoon movie. Check out the maps below, which outline the itinerary for our massive trip and should give you an idea of when and where to hide from us. Kidding! Mostly...

Saturday, 6/27: New Jersey

Sunday, 6/28 to Thursday, 7/2: Pennsylvania

Friday, 7/3 to Sunday, 7/5: Massachusetts

I'll be posting updates from each state as this magical journey unfolds, so get ready for swashbuckling action and daring feats of... oh, who am I kidding? There will be historic sites, cultural points of interest, tourist attractions, visits to some of my old haunts (yours truly was born and raised back east)... and FOOD. Lots and lots of delicious, so-good-but-it's-bad-for-you East Coast eats.

Prepare yourselves for the vicarious experience of the year! At least until I go to the Seattle area in late July. And then New Orleans at the end of October. So, more accurately, prepare yourselves for the vicarious experience of the month. Either way, I hope you have as much fun by reading as we are by doing. Onward!

Orange You Glad That "Orange" Is Back?

They say that puns are the lowest form of humor (but I just couldn't resist using that headline). Luckily, "Orange Is The New Black" knows better, and by striving for higher-brow dramedy, the show finally came into its own this year. "Orange" was one of the first original series produced by Netflix, and it's still among the platform's best offerings. The show is a far cry from early descriptions of it as a funnier, female-driven "Oz" (HBO's acclaimed, gritty prison drama). Now in its third season, "Orange" has matured nicely thanks to significant growth in its characters and its storytelling.

Seasons one and two were largely focused on new inmate Piper (Taylor Schilling), a privileged city girl who takes the fall for some drug-related indiscretions from her younger, wilder days. Schilling's capable acting hits every note that a person in such a setting would encounter, but it doesn't change the fact that Piper as a character is just plain unlikable. We empathize with her situation, but we never really sympathize with her as a person because she is beyond difficult to relate with and to read. No one knows this better than her ex-girlfriend Alex (Laura Prepon), a fellow inmate who introduced Piper to the drug-dealing world and may or may not be involved in how she ended up behind bars.

Their story provides the main thrust of the early episodes as Piper tries to navigate a new world of people and interactions that are completely unknown to her. Much of the show's comedy at this point was derived from awkward cringe humor, where you only laugh to break the nervous tension, because the misadventures of Piper and her friends and enemies in such a desolate place make you so uncomfortable. Artistically, "Orange" did have its share of initial struggles. The acting was always stellar and on-point, but the first season found it particularly hard (less so in the second season) to find the right tone for such a complicated premise and sprawling cast.

These other inmates are part of the most compelling cast on television; nearly every character is a woman, and they are incredibly diverse in their ethnicity and sexuality. This is one ensemble whose portrayals pass the infamous Bechdel test for visual media with flying colors! The series has a powerful hook in its tagline: "Every sentence has a story." Each episode delves into the past of an inmate, showing her life before prison and what got her to this point. More often than not, these flashbacks parallel what's happening in the present, as we (along with Piper and the others) attempt to understand more about these women. The show isn't shy about tackling heavy issues -- racism, sexism, violence, poverty -- but it always does so without judgment or derision, transcending stereotypes and forcing us to see these characters as people who just happen to be prisoners rather than the other way around.

This season was by far the fastest, the funniest, and the most formidable yet. "Orange" episodes tend to run close to 60 minutes each, given the amount of ground they cover, but the pacing was finely tuned to keep things moving without them feeling like such full hours. With Piper (thankfully) out of the foreground and the dynamics of the other characters fully formed, the writers clearly have a handle on how to strike a balance that serves both the farcical elements and the central humanity of the series. The sense of humor has also been uniquely elevated. Now that all the "prison-is-weird" jokes are out of their system, the inmates can allow more of their quirky personalities and untapped intelligence to shine through, rather than their sensitive exteriors and gruff behaviors. Hearing the inmates dissect everything from politics to popular culture -- notably one amusing diatribe trashing pop stars The Black Eyed Peas -- earns genuine laughter as opposed to the more reserved chuckles of the earlier seasons.

Seasoned small-screen vets like Kate Mulgrew (Red) and Lea DeLaria (Big Boo) carry their gravitas without chewing the scenery, and Laverne Cox (Sophia) deservedly gets a fair share of the show's press for her groundbreaking performance. The rest of the main cast is superb across the board, but it's nice to see a show that is equally powered by so many new, promising faces in the supporting roles. Even more impressive is the fluidity of the characters' functions in the story. Rather than confining everyone to the same archetypal box as when Piper arrived, the so-called villains can be surprising sources of wisdom, the people we were set up to despise can become endearing, and the characters with the least amount of screen time can be the most affecting. Like Norma, the mute inmate, who speaks volumes about what's going on without ever opening her mouth. It's one of many hallmarks that show just how far "Orange" has come, as well as the artistry that lies ahead if it stays the course.

Many of the inmates spent the better part of this season in search of something -- faith, love, money, power, family, the list goes on -- to make sense of their bleak, mundane surroundings. The concept of miracles and finding meaning were recurring themes in many of the characters' storylines. "Orange Is The New Black" itself is the miracle, giving meaning to human experiences that are rarely explored so bravely on television, streaming or otherwise.

Denver: Take More Pride In Your PrideFest

For an event with every color of the rainbow in its logo, Denver's annual PrideFest likes to work in shades of gray. Year after year, the festival ends up being a mixed bag of results that makes me wonder if there's a better way of doing things.

On the pro side, the amount of turnout in support of the LGBT community is always encouraging.

• Denver's festival is considered the largest in the region (since some neighboring mountain states don't offer much in the way of celebration).
• According to The Center, Colorado's primary LGBT resource, we're the third-largest festival in the country.
• The Center estimates that an average of 325,000 people attend annually, and this year's numbers were closer to 370,000.
• According to a recent study, Pride weekend generates an economic impact of $25 million for Denver restaurants, hotels, retail stores, bars, and other businesses.
• We also feature the nation's seventh-largest parade, representing almost 150 entities that range from community interests and allied churches to cultural outlets and politicians.

To me, the spirit of the parade is what Pride represents: not a numbers game, but an emphasis on the groups that reflect the LGBT population and promote the progressive attitudes of the state as a whole.

Meanwhile, the cons are dangerously close to stealing the pros' thunder. This year was the 40th anniversary of Denver's celebration, and milestone years tend to be when all of the stops are pulled out.

• Last year, we were teased with the possibility of Cyndi Lauper as this year's headlining act. In her absence, we should have gotten someone of a similar caliber. With all due respect to Mya -- a talented performer in her own right -- such a prominent festival in a milestone year should have been able to land an entertainer on par with the legacy and momentum of the LGBT movement over these last few decades.
• Another consideration is the amount of space. Civic Center Park already feels overcrowded, and if the event continues to grow as projected, alternate locations may eventually have to be utilized. Civic Center does have the added benefit of a built-in amphitheater, but portable stages are built all the time for these kinds of events.
• Gay and straight couples alike who have children often remark that they wish for a more family-oriented presence beyond the park's hard-partying atmosphere. What a missed opportunity! Local entities could be opening their doors with inclusive activities and workshops to make kids think about these important issues while still having fun.
• The corporate presence at the festival can be overwhelming and tiresome. While an event of this magnitude isn't possible without sponsorship, it can end up feeling like one giant, blurred-together commercial. This bombardment especially pulls focus during the parade, which should really be about the people and not the dollar signs.

In my humble opinion -- merely as an attendee and observer, not as any sort of expert in budgets or event planning -- here are a few suggestions that could really put Denver's PrideFest on the map and set an example among celebrations nationwide.

• First and foremost, PrideFest is held over the third weekend in June, and it always falls on Father's Day. Why not have the parade and the festival just on that Saturday? Not only would it avoid time conflicts with family plans (especially for those with fathers who sadly aren't supportive), but it would also consolidate resources and spending into a single blowout day of recognition.
• With Civic Center becoming too small for the expanding scale of the event, a number of possible venues could match the required capacity and still provide a central-enough location. Other parks like City, Cheesman, or Washington already host large summer events. Provided that the right permits are secured, any of these could be a logical next step. As a bonus, the influx of visitors would draw vital spending to those parts of town. It would also keep traffic and transit delays away from the hub of the already-busy central business district.
• There's one festival staple that can easily be done away with: those pesky food and beverage tickets. It's essentially a scam that X dollars will buy Z tickets, but items cost Y tickets, and somehow you always end up with leftover tickets that go to waste. The event can stay cash-only to avoid technical troubleshooting and processing fees, but a reasonably small entry fee could offset the ticket hassle and maybe even include a voucher for select items to get people started. This change would likely increase festival revenue because people would actually get what they paid for, rather than skipping on the snacks to go indulge at one of the not-as-close-as-you-think downtown establishments.
• Finally, reinventing traditional fundraising models would help reduce the corporate mentality and allow the festival to afford the next level of features. To draw out the big bucks, all the organizers have to do is incentivize the sponsorship opportunities and make them more competitive. By offering fewer tiers, but still providing the prestige of sponsoring specific aspects of the event, they would be leveraging those big company names to make things happen in mutually beneficial ways. They could even borrow ideas from crowdfunding and social media by raising festival funds with a specific mini-goals in mind -- rather than a generalized, less enticing "give us money for lots of things" -- to help meet the shifting needs and demands of the event from year to year.

In today's increasingly divided sociopolitical climate, a festival like PrideFest in a swing state like Colorado needs to make the best possible statement to demonstrate the capabilities of the LGBT community. This event is more than just a really big party; when planned and executed properly, it can be an effective public tool for advocacy, knowledge, outreach, and resilience. If we truly want to organize and mobilize to make a difference, let's start small with the potential that already exists. PrideFest may not be totally broken, but it could still use some fixing.

"Jurassic World" Revives Extinct Franchise

Early in "Jurassic World" -- which has roared into theaters 22 years after the original "Jurassic Park" first hit the big screen -- one of the protagonists jokes that people aren't impressed by dinosaurs anymore because consumers want everything to be bigger. Luckily for viewers, the bigger-is-better mantra doesn't detract from what this movie accomplishes. A rare Hollywood intelligence is on display here: not just in the film's sci-fi roots about genetic modification and humans versus nature, but also in its reverence to and reinvention of "Park" and the previous (albeit lesser) sequels. "Jurassic World" is a textbook example of the perfect summer blockbuster: fun and thrills with a side of smarts.

"World" takes us to a time and place (22 years later, naturally) where the utter failures of the well-intentioned first park still sting, but not enough to keep The Powers That Be from trying again. In this fictional world, those failures have become the stuff of legend. Merchandise from the original venture are rare online finds that bring both bragging rights for the buyer and the scorn of colleagues who think the items are in poor taste. As for the park itself, business is booming, and operations manager Claire (Bryce Dallas Howard) is busy overseeing the upcoming launch of the latest attraction. A genetic hybrid, Indominus Rex, has been bred as the ultimate predator -- vicious AND intelligent -- but the lab's splicing and dicing has given the creature some unforeseen advantages over its creators. As Claire consults with park colleague Owen (Chris Pratt) about whether the world is ready for such an animal, Indominus makes its move... just in time for a visit by Claire's nephews.

Contrary to louder, dumber big-budget affairs like the recent "Transformers" franchise, "Jurassic World" succeeds in large part because it works on two important levels simultaneously. The first level, of course, is the nostalgia factor. Will a movie whose success is largely predicated by its own legacy and reputation be able to resonate with the generation raised on the original film while still appealing to the current crop of audience members? In this case, the answer is a resounding yes.

Though it continues the story started in "Park," "World" proudly blazes its own trail while staying true to the witty, nimble, and action-packed spirit of its forerunner. Passing mentions of John Hammond (the "spare-no-expense" entrepreneur behind the first park) and brief glimpses of the animated, talking DNA strand from the original film's tour guide video were rewarding chuckles for observant moviegoers. We aren't treated to a scene as memorable as a lawyer being eaten off a toilet, but all of our favorite dinosaurs are back for more carnage, and clever twists mean that their functions in the story are not as predetermined as they were the first time around. Full disclosure: I also got serious goosebumps when the now-iconic instrumental theme was heard for the first time. (Recurring motifs from John Williams' score are present, but they have been re-orchestrated slightly to fit with Michael Giacchino's new music.)

The second measure of success is the legitimacy factor. Is this a movie that can stand on its own merits when considered away from its franchise? The premise is so intrinsically linked to the earlier titles that it's harder to be objective. However, from the perspective of plot mechanics and technical achievement, the answer is a more qualified yes. Borrowing from the great tradition of slow-burn blockbusters like "Jaws," the movie takes its time building suspense through the introduction of characters and the exploration of its environment before really letting it hit the fan. In a much-appreciated touch of restraint, the Indominus conveys its enormity by rarely being shown in full at first, keeping the actors and their surroundings to an appropriate scale as they avoid (or fail to avoid) its teeth and claws.

Pratt gives us further proof of why he's the go-to young action star of the moment. His physicality and rugged charm carry the movie even when the dinosaurs steal the show. Howard is admittedly less convincing in her role, since her workaholic character struggles to be sympathetic and human even in these dire circumstances. I'm inclined to give her bonus points, though, for performing all of her running and rescuing stunts while wearing heels!

I particularly enjoyed the sly commentary about corporate intrusion on the natural wonder of the park. Though the entrance pavilion is full of prominent brands, stores, and chain restaurants (they even have a Starbucks!), the employees debate where to draw the line when it comes to sponsors naming the exhibits or even the dinosaurs themselves. Speaking of those dinosaurs (they are the real stars, after all), the movie itself is beautifully made. The 3-D presentation is detailed and immersive without looking overly processed, and the use of surround sound is incredibly effective in making you feel like you're right there on the island, down to every last dino-sized leaf rustle and footfall. The movie is truly a multi-sensory experience that demands to be seen in a theater.

Which brings me to my next point, probably the only significant contention that I have with the film. "Jurassic Park" was groundbreaking in the history of special effects, both at the time in 1993 and by today's standards. Its pioneering, award-winning use of CGI combined with stunningly lifelike animatronics made the far-fetched premise seem authentically possible. "Jurassic World" does employ many of the same techniques and still to great effect, but it leans a little too heavily on the computer-generated elements. The dinosaurs were much more fearsome when it looked like they were actually stomping in front of the camera rather than being more dots and pixels (however well-formed) in the foreground. "World" never strays into the wildly cartoonish CGI pitfalls of "Avatar" or the generally despised "Star Wars" prequels, but it does take away from that initial, awe-inspiring movie magic that will never be captured in quite the same way thanks to today's era of glorified digital cinematography.

By having just enough in common with its primary successor without retracing its steps, "Jurassic World" is the sequel that "The Lost World" (1997) and "Jurassic Park III" (2001) should have been. My chief concern in the film's conclusion, which leaves open the possibility for yet another sequel, is the direction that such a movie would take. While my theories about how a next chapter would hypothetically play out involve some pretty spoiler-heavy details, I can safely say that they would have to tread VERY carefully to avoid rehashing the mistakes of the other sequels. We've already seen the test run of the park fail, the alternate testing island was visited not once but twice, and now the operational park has failed. "Lost World" even gave us a taste of dinosaurs in the "real world" when a T-Rex escaped its cargo ship and hit the mainland, rampaging through San Diego and jumping the shark (or dinosaur, as it were) in one of the silliest plot devices ever conceived on film, "Jurassic" or otherwise.

Will these scientists and corporations ever learn? The central lesson of the movie (and the franchise) surprisingly parallels the state of filmmaking as an industry: even when armed with the most cutting-edge technology, humans will never be able to completely control the forces of nature. There are only so many ways to tell this kind of story, but if they keep making them as entertaining and edifying as "Jurassic World," I can think of worse ways to spend a hot summer day in a cool movie theater.

"The Briefcase" Should Pack Up And Leave

Ignore them and they'll go away. This logic isn't just for people who bother you anymore. Most reality shows -- although vapid and ultimately meaningless -- can also safely be ignored because their sense of importance is entirely self-deluded. However, the problem with a show like "The Briefcase" is that ignoring it will make the network think this kind of exploitation is acceptable. News flash, CBS: it's not!

To be clear, I absolutely refuse to watch an episode of "The Briefcase" for fear of compromising my values and my brain cells. Instead, I'll provide its basic premise to illustrate my disgust. Two families with financial difficulties are given briefcases with $101,000 in them (why there's an extra thousand instead of an even hundred is beyond me, but I digress). A choice is outlined: they can either keep some or all of the money, or they can give away some or all of the money. They aren't aware that the other family has the same amount and instructions, and they have three days to decide what to do and how much to give. Here's the kicker: during those three days, the families are told about the others' plights, in an attempt to up the ante and sway their decisions for better or for worse. When I count to three, can we all get nauseous?

Besides the obvious, what troubles me is that "The Briefcase" is a lose-lose situation in most of its scenarios -- not just a loss of money, but a loss of integrity. If you choose to give away even a small portion and they choose to keep all of it, they're extra rich (and arguably terrible people) while you're left with less even after doing something noble. No one should ever be in the position to put a price tag on the worth of a family's life and circumstances. It creates a false sense of betterment and superiority, which is the only sense that money can buy in such a tragic, uniquely American mindset. The only logical conclusion is that both parties should give away all of the money so that everyone can fully benefit. Unfortunately, that kind of drama-free ending wouldn't play well in the morally bankrupt realm of "reality" television, let alone if it happened every single episode. In the mind of the producers, surely no one would watch if the stakes were removed and an outcome was guaranteed from the beginning.

Fellow CBS reality shows "Survivor" and "The Amazing Race" feature contestants who have consciously made a choice to portray themselves and their competitive skills in a visibly game-oriented setting. "The Briefcase," on the other hand, depicts people's actual, real-life struggles with today's uncertain economy: poverty, unemployment, and living conditions, where choice is clearly not an option. Rather than addressing the issue with the sensitivity and call-to-action of a documentary, the show is aiming for profit and (alleged) entertainment value. Or worse, for sport. For shame is more like it! Bottom line: they are asking people to place a dollar amount on the problems of others, all for the amusement of the viewing public, and it is truly sickening.

By the time of its May 27 premiere, critics and commentators denounced "The Briefcase" almost unanimously. "Time" even went as far as declaring it the worst reality show ever. Low praise indeed, especially after the parade of thoughtless exercises in manufactured reality stretching from "The Simple Life" and "Jersey Shore" to the franchises of "The Bachelor/The Bachelorette" and "The Real Housewives of (Fill In The Blank)." Considering its repellent peers and reputation, why has "The Briefcase" already lasted this long? The almighty dollar has spoken, of course. Its modest ratings don't classify it as a breakaway hit, but they are comparatively good for the hit-or-miss summer season. Apparently, advertisers remain unfazed, as I have yet to hear of anyone formally pulling out of the show. I just can't fathom why any company would want to be in business with a show (or network, for that matter) implicitly linking them to such a deplorable message.

Despite recent younger-skewing hits ("How I Met Your Mother" and "The Big Bang Theory," to name a few), CBS has often been labeled as a more conservative channel with a generally older audience. As it turns out, even they aren't immune to the proliferation of this sub-human brand of diversion. I almost want to scold them because they're supposed to be the "grown-up" of the broadcast networks. The show could maybe skate by if it subverted its premise to deploy a biting satire on human nature and the state of our country. Maybe. But when all is said and done, CBS simply should have known better than to exercise such poor judgment by green-lighting this hot mess of cold ethics.

In the past, I have lobbied networks to save shows like "Wonderfalls" and "Veronica Mars," but this is the first time I've ever felt so strongly that a series does NOT deserve to take away airtime from other (likely better) slot-fillers. If you feel the same way, please consider signing the online petition to have CBS cancel the show. Their goal is currently 500 signatures, but I'm not sure how many names it will take for the network to legitimately consider the request. The way I see it? Even if nothing happens, at least we can say we made an effort and took a stand.

The immortal rallying cry of the 1976 film "Network," which eerily predicted the rise of sensationalized programming, rings true now more than ever. "I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not going to take this anymore!" Television may be part of big business, but as its consumers, we still deserve to be heard and respected.

TED Brings Ideas Galore To Denver

Now entering its fifth year, TEDx Mile High (the "x" indicates an authorized, independently organized TED event) presented its latest Denver conference, "Ideas Unbridled," on June 13. The internationally-recognized TED Talks were originally conceived with a focus on Technology, Entertainment, and Design, but their scope and purpose have significantly broadened over the years to address a variety of social, cultural, and scientific issues.

Each "Ideas Unbridled" presentation had at least one of two points: how to make current ideas more effective and/or how to overcome resistance when breaking new ground. Here are the 15 most insightful statements (one from each speaker) that I took away from the conference. Bad joke/pun alert: If you're hungry, there's definitely food-for-thought here. (You're welcome!)

15. Our living spaces affect our mental and emotional well-being.
Mandy Straight, an interior designer, made a case for why the visual mantra of appreciating your surroundings every day makes a difference in mood and productivity. Even more compelling was her ability to do this without sounding too New Age or like an infomercial for her profession.

14. "Try to learn something you thought was impossible."
Jesse Zhang, a scientist, gave a lot of intriguing data about his recently published studies in atmospheric and oceanic phenomena. It never really spoke to me... until the emcee said that Zhang just graduated from high school. I guess it's never too early to start making a difference!

13. Change the "impossible" into the difficult.
Teju Ravilochan used humorous anecdotes to show that change is only possible through trial and error, and failure is part of the process. His engaging delivery made up for the been-there, done-that nature of his speech, but it was still a nice reminder that everything does eventually have a result.

12. Ethics are not as simple as we think.
Catharyn Baird, a noted researcher on the subject, illustrated ways to be ethically mature individuals who conduct their personal and professional lives with integrity. It comes down to striking a balance between rationality and sensibility (head vs. heart) and autonomy and equality (self vs. others).

11. "Make a comeback by giving back."
Entrepreneur Heidi Ganahl found her path in the business world by dealing with death, divorce, and bad decisions. She realized the only way to truly bounce back from life's hardships is to focus outward before inward, and to channel those setbacks, losses, and rejections into making a difference.

10. How to think is more important than what to think.
Mike Vaughan's presentation, "Rethinking Thinking," laid out values that are missing from the global marketplace. Picking strong questions over safe ones and action over answers would contribute to better collaboration and productivity. Computers may be good at answering, but people are still better at asking!

9. "Please touch the art."
Jen Lewin is an interactive artist who combines art and engineering by experimenting with color, light, and sound. Her public artwork brings people together by transforming the space and letting them share an experience. She makes art that's okay to touch, because art can touch each of us.

8. Social media has more power than we realize.
Chris Hansen uses data analysis to track public sentiment through social media. With 600 million tweets per day, Twitter can be a real-time indicator of factors like purchasing trends and voting habits. Perhaps most significant is the possibility of event detection based on user observations in high-risk locations.

7. "What you can't see CAN hurt you."
Theo Wilson, a poet and social activist, delivered a short but powerful spoken-word piece about the lingering effects of Columbine and the invisible "chemical properties of hate" that ruin our society.

6. Gender roles have no place in music.
Esme Patterson performed three songs from her latest album, a conceptual work where each track is a response to a famous song about a woman that was written by a man. Among her targets: "Lola" by The Kinks and "Billie Jean" by Michael Jackson. She admitted to liking the songs musically but, despite their status as classics, also being troubled by their lyrics.

5. "The next Silicon Valley is Suburbia."
Crowd-funding is poised to create the next generation of business owners and revolutionary product ideas from the comfort of our own homes. Speaker Peter Lynch was quick to point out that while no success is truly "overnight," tools like technology and community participation can make it easier.

4. Technology is amoral.
Joel Comm made the excellent point that technology is not immoral (against morals) because it inherently doesn't even have them. With 3 billion Internet users and 1.6 billion social media users worldwide, it's our responsibility to apply morals to the Web by being authentic and honest online.

3. The stigma of discussing mental health issues has to end.
Emmy Betz, a leading injury prevention researcher, explained that suicide causes twice as many deaths as car crashes. Depression affects people in different ways, but it needs to become more acceptable to talk about it. Wording doesn't matter as much as the gesture of asking someone if they're okay!

2. We can remove the systems that keep people in poverty.
Using one of Denver's most low-income neighborhoods as an example, Eric Kornacki talked about how his organization overcame a lack of municipal assistance and grocery store interest to create the largest community agriculture program in the country. They created jobs and kept money in the neighborhood by taking the economy into their own hands!

1. The concept of work-life balance is a myth.
Kris Boesch calculated that we each spend 2,000 hours per year at work, and technology makes it harder to separate home from the office. Because the personal and the professional are so intertwined, Boesch calls for more emotional intimacy and respect in the workplace so that we're not afraid to be ourselves. Plus, anyone who can convince 2,000-plus attendees to do The Wave is fine in my book!

If any or all of these ideas sound promising, the next TEDx event will be held on September 19 at The University of Denver's Newman Center. Pending TED approval, there is also a fall event in Boulder that has yet to be scheduled. In addition to comparing and contrasting the themes and the quality of the sessions, it will be interesting to see if and how any of the upcoming speakers will embrace the challenges imparted by these community and industry leaders.

Go Big Data Or Go Home

The word of the day is "almost." I almost never go see an artist in concert if they only have one album to their name. The average length of an album these days is around 45 minutes, and a good concert (once the headliner takes the stage) should last at least 90 solid minutes. If I've done my math correctly, then I won't see an artist until they have at least two albums under their belt. In addition to a larger swath of material to play, they've also had more time to hone their craft as well as their stage presence.

When Big Data (a.k.a. Alan Wilkis and friends) played at The Gothic Theatre on Friday night, I'm glad that I made an exception to my one-album rule. "2.0" IS a good album, so I already had an idea of what to expect. Despite a shorter set list than I'm used to, Big Data proved themselves to be anything but a one-trick pony.

Opening act Inner Oceans took the stage at exactly 8:30, marking the event as perhaps the only rock concert in history to start on time. Their tactful use of synthesizers blurred the lines between the different decades that their music evokes. By effortlessly hopping between genres while still keeping their spirit intact, the resulting blend was sublime, subdued, and dreamlike. (Or is it dreamy? No, that refers to the Zoolander-approved frontman.) His smooth, mellow vocals kept the soaring reverb and distortion effects grounded. He also shared nice harmonies and palpable chemistry with the female co-vocalist. It's a good sign when the opener matches the tone of the headliner while holding their own and also making you want to know more about them and their music.

While it's pretty common to see open floor during a warm-up act, it's unusual to see that amount of space when a headliner starts playing, especially when said headliner has several singles in heavy rotation on multiple radio stations. It's even more noticeable in a smaller venue that is often filled with wall-to-wall people on slow nights. Big Data arrived on stage to a fairly minimal set-up -- two singers, a laptop and turntable, a drum set and two guitars -- but that didn't stop them from exponentially rocking the house despite the turnout.

It was a relief to see instruments and live vocals filling out their sound as opposed to an entire show of just Wilkis with headphones on and his head cocked to the side, repeatedly scratching and looping his way through the night. The sound crew wasn't always careful about the balance between vocals and instruments, leaving the tangible energy coming off the stage muted during times when Wilkis was visibly giving his all. In addition to being a talented producer, he has genuine stage presence and even some surprising dance cred (not to mention unmissable bright-red sneakers). While his female vocalist and partner-in-crime was top-notch, it was a bit strange to hear songs made famous with other singers all sung by the same person. Wilkis also spent an inordinate amount of time tinkering with the computer playback, often in the middle of performing, but it sounded fine to begin with. Maybe I'm too observant!

While we're on the subject of computers, electronic music always runs the risk of feeling cold and impersonal. Big Data differentiates themselves by giving warmth and life to their records, and they succeed even more so when playing live. By infusing the electronic aspects with pure rock-soul firepower, they created a more sensory and three-dimensional concert experience for the audience. In keeping with their technology-centric motif, crowd interaction was minimal, but prerecorded robo-messages prompted frequently requested audience participation like clapping along or cheering louder. Still, the group knows how to have fun and promote the human element of their performance, from a mid-song tango break between the singers to collapsing on stage in part-reverence, part-exhaustion after a positively incendiary solo by one of the guitarists.

Overall, the concert was a perfect primer for Big Data by appealing to existing fans as well as to people looking for a better sense of what the band is good at. After opening with current single "The Business Of Emotion," they played the album more or less in its entirety, just in a different order and with a few added surprises. Their funkified cover of Hall and Oates' "Private Eyes" fit right into the set, showing they're just as capable of super-sizing other people's songs as they are their own.

Before closing the night with their smash hit "Dangerous," Wilkis took a moment to thank the attendees. "I'm breaking my code right now. I don't usually talk because the robot tells us what to do," he joked. It's snarky commentary about their on-stage modus operandi and quite possibly their newfound fame, but the voice has yet to steer them wrong. The way they brought out obscure layers of their own music can attest to their admirable and emerging potential. If Big Data continues on its current trajectory, they'll be filling larger venues in no time.

Has Florence's Machine Stalled?

Let's not mince words: Florence Welch could sing the phone book and I would actually pay money to listen eagerly and intently. As Florence + The Machine, her voice is a guiding force of nature that fleshes out the band's music into something truly original and unmistakably their own.

Their first album, "Lungs" (2009), delicately strung together a variety of genres into a soulful, at times sultry exploration of the fine lines between pop, rock, and classical influences. Sophomore album "Ceremonials" (2011) pushed that journey further by weaving an intricate tapestry of layered, ethereal soundscapes to produce what can only be described as modern chamber music. I gush like this to show my overwhelming surprise that their latest offering, "How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful," is drastically more earthy and raw. It still has power, but since music like theirs is in the ear of the beholder, that power can be wielded for good or evil.

From the get-go, we should know that something's going to be different with this album. The colors and surreal images from their previous cover art are replaced here with a stark, black-and-white photo of Welch staring right at us. For an album with the words "blue" and "beautiful" in the title, it seems counterproductive to be so lifeless at the outset. (Is it bad that I do kind of like the font?) It's almost as though she's going out of her way to tell us that past flourishes -- the lush orchestration of "Cosmic Love," the epic, swelling chorus of "Shake It Out," and even the chilling string section that undulates in B-side favorite "Heavy In Your Arms" -- are no more... at least for now.

They do peek out around the edges, though, so fans needn't worry that she's completely turned her back on their signature sound. For the record, Welch can still sing anything, and the band will follow suit. However, the album raises an important question: "Should she?" To be clear, I'm all in favor of artist experimentation and trying out new sounds or directions. In this case, despite her vocal prowess and stunning range, these songs are rather lackluster from a strictly musical standpoint. Strike one: many of the songs sound like they could have easily been done by other artists or bands. Strike two is even worse: when you don't realize, due to their similarities, that one song has ended and another has started.

Fortunately, the album isn't enough of a miss to warrant third-strike status. But when it's compared to the caliber of "Lungs," an unusually assured debut that feels more fully realized and carries more verve, "How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful" does falter. Clearly, this doesn't indicate a lack of talent -- their ability to consistently sell out venues in mere minutes would support this assessment -- but rather a reach bigger than their grasp. The band is trying too hard to demonstrate their savvy and their versatility when, by all accounts, they have nothing left to prove!

Highlights like "Queen Of Peace" and "Various Storms And Saints" are thankfully on hand to redeem the album from being totally homogenized. In fact, the sheer strength of her voice and the insightful, thought-provoking lyrics are all that distinguish this as an F+TM album. The way Welch vocally wraps her entire being around such telling statements as "My love is no good against the fortress that it made of you" from the aforementioned "Queen" is moving and hauntingly poetic. "How Big..." is still worth a few thorough listens, particularly to allow the better songs more time to grow on you. Meanwhile, I'd much rather spend the wait for their next album hoping for a return to form.

Muse Makes Us Their "Drones"

It has been fascinating to watch Muse evolve during their career from a fizzy mixture of alt-glam with a decidedly electronic edge to now graduating near the top of their class as full-blown arena superstars. With their latest album, "Drones," they have successfully tweaked the formula that made them famous, and the school of rock is back in session.

The sweep and scope of Muse's recent albums -- 2009's "The Resistance" and 2012's "The 2nd Law" -- were benchmarks that raised the bar for the band and their contemporaries. This entry in their discography is on par with them artistically, but in terms of the sound, it hews a bit closer to the straightforward nature of their earlier works. Admittedly, the structure of the album is something of a puzzle. An already short track list includes two brief interludes, "Drill Sergeant" and "JFK," that are thematic reinforcements but hardly necessary. Meanwhile, "The Globalist" clocks in at just over 10 minutes, so the run time more or less balances itself out.

Lyrically, themes of technology, paranoia, oppression, and revolution have been common for the group in the past, but never as explicitly as they are here. What exactly is Muse so afraid of? In this era of instant information and connectivity, "Drones" provides a daring and highly relevant analogy, deciphering the fate of personal relationships through the macrocosm of the fate of the free world. Thankfully, fans and critics seem to enjoy them, so at least they don't have to worry about that!

Muse songs tend to have a pop sheen (some thinner than others) to make their rock vibes glisten for a mainstream audience. More often than not, that layer is gleefully scraped away here. The grinding, industrial guitar squeals and insistent bass lines that ignite many of the tracks make the album sound big, but its target is small and on-point. There's enough modulation and variety in the music to keep it from ever feeling like a one-note assault. As usual, vocalist Matt Bellamy is in fine form, matching the tone of each track from passionately plaintive ("Mercy") to a defiant falsetto ("The Handler") and daring the listener to doubt his convictions. In the rock genre, I definitely respect that Bellamy remembers to use his voice as an instrument. His singing is powerful enough to snarl the snark and satire of his lyrics without resorting to the showy vocal tics that can doom otherwise potent performers.

The sound and perspective of the album have a genuinely cohesive impact, but almost to a fault. Oddly, there isn't a standout track that can be isolated for casual listening. Even the singles released to radio so far, "Dead Inside" and "Psycho," are solid on the album but not overly catchy on their own merits. While the later tracks loosen their grip enough to lighten the mood a little, the album still functions better as a whole, so one would be remiss to skip around in search of favorites. In the end, "Drones" becomes an album in the truest sense of the word: a collection of songs specifically designed and compiled to convey a message, or perhaps an experience. In Muse's case, they have once again proven that they are capable of doing both.

Among other things, this album as well as the band itself exist to warn us against being mindless followers -- of people, political parties, or even music industry trends. Ironically, I'm ready to enlist without reservation for whatever Bellamy and friends have planned next. Their cautionary vision of the future is far more compelling than most of what passes for entertainment today.

A Game For A Mere "Mortal"

While I've never been a huge fan of video games, they played an important part in some of my favorite childhood memories. Whether it was staying up late with my cousin to beat the original "Super Mario Brothers" on Nintendo or competing with my younger sister to find all of the hidden surprises in old-school "Tomb Raider," video games have matured right along with me. As I got older, graphics got better, consoles got more expensive, and storylines got downright complex. But even as a non-gamer, the "Mortal Kombat" franchise has stuck with me over the years. *Side note/nerd alert: I was such a fan in middle school that a choir class project when we created a product and its jingle resulted in "Political Kombat," where famous leaders of the past and present duke it out, with a theme song to the tune of "Hakuna Matata." Needless to say, when the latest "MK" title dropped in April, I felt giddy like a kid all over again. (Although this fan-created gem was also a welcome blast from the past!)

"Mortal Kombat X" is the ideal blend for a casual player to get excited about gaming as an adult. The graphics are stunning and practically cinematic, and new gameplay modes and features keep replay from becoming stale. I especially enjoy the ability to interact with the environment. Rather than just moving the characters in front of the background, each fight location has a few objects to use and areas to jump from that keep you on your toes. The controller did take some getting used to, though, especially for someone whose muscle memory takes over whenever he finds the older arcade versions and nearly breaks the joystick remembering the combos. On the other hand, the plot (yes, there actually is one) may confuse people who haven't followed the franchise closely, especially its more modern iterations. Thankfully, there are enough familiar faces and signature moves among the fighters to remind you what you're playing. As an added bonus, Jason Voorhees and Predator are among the downloadable characters, so even after 20-plus years, the franchise isn't afraid of trying something new or taking itself too seriously.

Naturally, the one thing that hasn't changed is the "kombat" itself in all of its gory glory. Blowing off a little steam just got a whole lot more colorful! The game creators joked in a recent interview that the seemingly too-gross or too-implausible finishing moves are what they set out to try programming first. While I dare say that this is the bloodiest game I've ever played, "MK" or otherwise, I honestly don't see the harm in it. Unlike "Grand Theft Auto" and other exploitative titles, the action takes place in a fictional setting that has no bearing on the real world. It's much easier to dissociate this fantasy violence from the gritty, desensitized realism that so many other games seem to be proud of. Plus, the "MK" games utilize strong female characters and characters of color, preventing them from being victimized or minoritized. The only negative aspect of the game is almost embarrassing: I could definitely live without the characters' pre-fight banter in two-player mode. I've seen sharper barbs on Laffy Taffy wrappers. Better luck next time, writers! And next time is practically guaranteed, given the sales and reception of this version so far.

Overall, I guess I really can't complain too much. The wave of nostalgia generated by "Mortal Kombat X" makes it a fun ride. While the franchise was able to expand into movies, TV shows, comic books, and card games -- meeting with mixed results along the way -- it works at its best when you take away all of the commercialized trappings and just enjoy it for what it is: the good, old-fashioned, over-the-top, digital butt-kicking that you know and love after a long day at work.

No Lies About This "Pretty Little" Show

I'm the first to admit it: the first time I saw the trailer for ABC Family's "Pretty Little Liars," I rolled my eyes and sighed. What looked like nothing more than a teen soap opera dressed up in detective clothes couldn't possibly survive the cutthroat TV ratings game. Or could it? When buzz for the show started swirling right out of the gate, my morbid curiosity took hold. The first episode reached out and grabbed me, and I've been hooked ever since. Never judge a book by its cover, and never judge a series by its premise.

With the premiere of its sixth (yes, sixth) season this week, "PLL" has done an astonishing job of sustaining its central mystery. In short, a group of teenage girls loses a troubled friend under mysterious circumstances. When she turns up dead, they all start receiving texts, notes, and other taunting calling-cards from the mysterious "A," who threatens to share the survivors' own secrets unless they carry out A's wishes. Basically, it's the worst case of cyber-bullying EVER. In exploring what really happened on that fateful night, the writers (sometimes sadists) always resolve enough plot threads to keep you happy while raising more questions to take their place. Unlike other long-running series, these "yes, but now" developments are not the sign of desperate story contrivances to delay the inevitable, but rather evidence of a carefully detailed mythology that propels the plot and its themes forward. Pretty deep for a show about pretty girls!

Don't get me wrong: the show is hardly perfect. There have been horrendously awkward guest stars (I'm looking at you, Adam Lambert), and there have been a subplot or two that go absolutely nowhere except to give the actors more screen time. I've always liked Laura Leighton, who plays one of the mothers, but she should have just skipped the otherwise solidly plot-driven Season 3 Halloween episode (amusingly, the same episode as Lambert's appearance). In it, a little girl comes to Leighton's house, and she turns out to be a ghost. For a show that stays so grounded in reality, this was an odd and disorienting move, especially since that random ghost girl hasn't once been mentioned since, even in passing to poke fun at Leighton. Unless Random Ghost Girl is the key to everything and the trump-card mastermind that the show has kept up its sleeve all along? (If that ends up being even a small part of the ending, I'll be SUPER pissed and you can retroactively disregard this entire post...)

In addition, the usually sharp writing occasionally finds itself marred by the same cliched dialogue and predictable situations that whodunnits have used as crutches for decades. Still, it's almost refreshing to have one thing about the show that I can safely figure out on my own without frantic texts to fellow viewers. After several elaborately orchestrated close calls and deliberately misleading revelations, both I and the audience have yet to discover who's really behind everything and why. It's simultaneously thrilling and frustrating to not know how the series' endgame will play out. I also have to applaud these writers and producers -- on a network with "Family" in its name -- for not shying away from dark, edgy subject matter to properly set a tone that respects the characters and their intertwined stories.

To me, the most intriguing aspect of the show is its spin on the coming-of-age tropes found in similar youth-driven series. In any other show, our lead girls would deal with school pressure, family dynamics, and personal relationships through the more familiar lens of suburban privilege. "PLL" deals with all of that and more, putting these girls through the wringer while making some bold statements about the complex nature of honesty and the flexibility of right and wrong. There has been great reward in observing how the main characters have grown and changed as they struggle to reconcile the comfort of their small town with the weight of the secrets it holds. Among other attributes, it's these unique variations that continue to make the show worth watching.

Once you start, though, be prepared to binge-watch! And who knows? Seeing multiple episodes closer together may just yield an extra clue or two that casual weekly viewers missed. Add in the show's sly recurring references and homages to great mysteries and psychological thrillers of the past, and you get a pleasant surprise disguised as a guilty pleasure.

Get Rob'd Gets Reboot'd!

Blogging Regularly: Take 2. And... action!

Welcome (or welcome back) to my humble online abode. The last few years have brought a lot of personal growth and professional transition, but a single truth remains constant: I have things to say, and I want to write about them. So that said, here we go again!

This is the authoritative source for getting "Robbed" -- a.k.a. my observations and opinions on culture (pop or otherwise), the arts, and occasional rants about random topics. I don't want my thoughts to be a one-way street; please feel free to comment and share. Let's keep the discussion going! Think of it as my tiny contribution to the many things that make the world go 'round. Like this, or even this.

You've been warned ;)